Living in La Verna
I thought I should try to document what is entailed in living in a house with so much carisma as 9 Clonkeen Rd. Later on I'll go through a typical weekday and a tyipical weekend day, but first I have to introduce you to the people I live with:
Ross (Cuntface) Duffy.
Probably the most offensive person in Ireland, and if all goes his way with a lot of effort, the world. Ross enjoys the simple things in life and in many ways resembles, in actions and appearence, the Neanderthal man. His main loves are digging holes, Heavy Metal, ranting about rave, destroying everyones senses with his ass, drinking beer, not liking people and Sky Sports News. Ross is a bit of a hermit. He only leaves the house on very rare occasions, and even then at great distress. He has been spotted in Fibbers and formerly Bruxelles but recently he only strays as far as The Grove. Ross has problems not with big words, but with words in general. He tends to rename things to suit how his brain works, leaving everyone else in the dark. A normal afternoon with Ross in the house would be charachterised by porn (scat, dwarf and animal mainly), racism against everyone that isn't him (e.g. women, men, foreigners, Irish people, jocks, princesses, ravers, scumbags, homeless people, physically disabled people, mentally disabled people and the elderly). He's always the first home after work and the first to bed. He's clean (surprisingly) and is the best cook among us.
(Menstual) Moe Curtin.
The one with the dreds ... Moe's never there. Well in fairness now that Dave has moved out he's around more often. Moe either loves you or he hates you, and it can change in a flash. He probably has more fun than anyone I've ever met. The man also has the ability to stop time. He manages to get more productive stuff done in a day than I can in a month. Doesn't like sleeping alone and rarely has to. Showers once a week I think. More energy than the national grid.
Rob Jackson.
Action Jackson to anyone who's ever been to Schull. The newest member to the fraternity, Rob holds his head high, and his mind higher. Lived in Bray beforehand (we forgave him for that before he moved in (he sucked us off)) and so we know he's good with a weapon if zombies ever do attack.
A weekday in the life...
I'll describe Wednesday as it was a very typical day in my life in this house. I woke with my alarm raging at 8am after a unrestful nights sleep. I changed the alarm to go off again at 8:15, at 8:15 I changed it to go off at half 8. I got up then, put on my shower robe and went into the hall. I said "Hey" to Claire (one of the nurses who works in the house) and had a shower. After I got dressed, watched a bit of the news and went to work at about 8:50. Work was very normal that day. Got home at about 6:30pm. Ross and Rob were already home as always, Ross was drooling over football and Rob was lighting a fire. I cooked myself some spaghetti bolognese, got a bottle of Tuborg and sat in the living room with the guys. Ross was ranting about how these goddam unskilled ignorant refugees are taking all his jobs and pissing on him in the street. Ro O'Leary arrived and had a beer, while he waited for Moe to do some rehersal for Dead Girls & Boys in the garage (converted to band room). Then we watched "Hellraiser" and Ross nearly shat himself it was so good. Whelans ensued for Ro, Moe and I, the other two hate the place. Ro went home after one and Ciara arrived. Stayed there till near closing time then Moe drove home. I rolled a joint while watching some softcore porn, smoked it then went to bed. And that's the typical weekday.
A weekend day in the life...
Woke hungover, went to a play in Trinity and Ross & I left half way through to get food and watch the second half of the Ireland Austalia match in Doyles. Moved to Bankers for a few more Guinness and met Simon after the play. Simon left to do the second performance of the play. Moved to Mojo's on Henry street for some cheap pints. Went to a Japanese kareoke restaurant where red wine was poured down my throat by Grainne. Said happy birthday to Niamh and went to get some cash. Smoked a joint with two random strangers and had a chat on the street. Briefly went back to the restaurant but then headed off to Fibbers. Saw two fantastic metal bands (Itchy Trigger Finger & Speed King) for 2 euro and got very drunk. Went home.
Ross (Cuntface) Duffy.
Probably the most offensive person in Ireland, and if all goes his way with a lot of effort, the world. Ross enjoys the simple things in life and in many ways resembles, in actions and appearence, the Neanderthal man. His main loves are digging holes, Heavy Metal, ranting about rave, destroying everyones senses with his ass, drinking beer, not liking people and Sky Sports News. Ross is a bit of a hermit. He only leaves the house on very rare occasions, and even then at great distress. He has been spotted in Fibbers and formerly Bruxelles but recently he only strays as far as The Grove. Ross has problems not with big words, but with words in general. He tends to rename things to suit how his brain works, leaving everyone else in the dark. A normal afternoon with Ross in the house would be charachterised by porn (scat, dwarf and animal mainly), racism against everyone that isn't him (e.g. women, men, foreigners, Irish people, jocks, princesses, ravers, scumbags, homeless people, physically disabled people, mentally disabled people and the elderly). He's always the first home after work and the first to bed. He's clean (surprisingly) and is the best cook among us.
(Menstual) Moe Curtin.
The one with the dreds ... Moe's never there. Well in fairness now that Dave has moved out he's around more often. Moe either loves you or he hates you, and it can change in a flash. He probably has more fun than anyone I've ever met. The man also has the ability to stop time. He manages to get more productive stuff done in a day than I can in a month. Doesn't like sleeping alone and rarely has to. Showers once a week I think. More energy than the national grid.
Rob Jackson.
Action Jackson to anyone who's ever been to Schull. The newest member to the fraternity, Rob holds his head high, and his mind higher. Lived in Bray beforehand (we forgave him for that before he moved in (he sucked us off)) and so we know he's good with a weapon if zombies ever do attack.
A weekday in the life...
I'll describe Wednesday as it was a very typical day in my life in this house. I woke with my alarm raging at 8am after a unrestful nights sleep. I changed the alarm to go off again at 8:15, at 8:15 I changed it to go off at half 8. I got up then, put on my shower robe and went into the hall. I said "Hey" to Claire (one of the nurses who works in the house) and had a shower. After I got dressed, watched a bit of the news and went to work at about 8:50. Work was very normal that day. Got home at about 6:30pm. Ross and Rob were already home as always, Ross was drooling over football and Rob was lighting a fire. I cooked myself some spaghetti bolognese, got a bottle of Tuborg and sat in the living room with the guys. Ross was ranting about how these goddam unskilled ignorant refugees are taking all his jobs and pissing on him in the street. Ro O'Leary arrived and had a beer, while he waited for Moe to do some rehersal for Dead Girls & Boys in the garage (converted to band room). Then we watched "Hellraiser" and Ross nearly shat himself it was so good. Whelans ensued for Ro, Moe and I, the other two hate the place. Ro went home after one and Ciara arrived. Stayed there till near closing time then Moe drove home. I rolled a joint while watching some softcore porn, smoked it then went to bed. And that's the typical weekday.
A weekend day in the life...
Woke hungover, went to a play in Trinity and Ross & I left half way through to get food and watch the second half of the Ireland Austalia match in Doyles. Moved to Bankers for a few more Guinness and met Simon after the play. Simon left to do the second performance of the play. Moved to Mojo's on Henry street for some cheap pints. Went to a Japanese kareoke restaurant where red wine was poured down my throat by Grainne. Said happy birthday to Niamh and went to get some cash. Smoked a joint with two random strangers and had a chat on the street. Briefly went back to the restaurant but then headed off to Fibbers. Saw two fantastic metal bands (Itchy Trigger Finger & Speed King) for 2 euro and got very drunk. Went home.
posted by kevpatts at
9:34 PM
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